Grand Rapids....come for the churches, stay for the Nascar and Deer Hunting.
Monday, February 14, 2005
Cool Whip In My Hair
When I was younger, around age 13, the Eagles came out with their album "Hotel California." I thought this album was the greatest thing since sliced bread for 2 reasons:
Reason Number 1. In the song "Life in the Fast Lane" they said the word "Goddamn." This was a big deal for the radio stations so they blipped it out and the only way you could hear it was to own the album. Since we weren't allowed to swear in my house, I felt like I was getting away with something.
Reasons Number 2. My little sister kept running around the house singing the title track, only she sang: "On a dark desert highway, cool whip in my hair." This cracked me up to no end. I guess it should have been dessert anyway.
We've all had those moments of mistaken lyrics, and hilarity usually ensues. Thats why you MUST go to this website:
If you don't get the title then you didn't listen to hendrix so I'll explain it: In the song Purple Haze, Jimi says "'scuse me while I kiss the sky". Well...someone didn't quite hear it correctly and...you get the picture.
Anyway, this website has quite the extensive list of songs, and you can go visit and check out other peoples blunders and even enter your own. There's a place to say how old you were when you discovered you were wrong, how embarrassing the moment was, do you think your lyrics are better and so on.
Check it out...seriously.
My great lyrical blunder? When I was about 14 I was washing dishes in a restaurant and there were all these other guys working in the kitchen. They were all a little older and I thought they were cool. One day, the song "Peace Train" by Cat Stevens was on the radio. There I was singing along, washing my dishes, when one of the prep cooks came over and asked me:
"What did you say?"
"What?"
"The name of the song you're singing."
"Oh... G String...you know...G String sounding louder, loud on the G String"
I had taken guitar lessons...I knew what a G string was. Which is why I was so confused when all the guys in the kitchen doubled over with laughter. So Ricky the prep cook says:
"It's PEACE TRAIN you dumbass...Do you even know what a g string is?"
"Sure! It's a guitar string"
Again...I had taken guitar lessons...I knew what a G string was. Which is why I was so confused when all the guys in the kitchen doubled over with laughter AGAIN. So Ricky the prep cook tells me what the other kind of g-string is.
"AHHHH"
I never knew they were called THAT! I had always called them sexy underwear and knew that when worn by the proper type of woman Mr. Happy came to life (the women in the penthouses and hustlers always had them on. My buddy's dad just left those magazines out in the open, which made him the coolest dad in the world).
So there you have it. Who knew lingerie and world peace were so inexorably entwined.
P.S. If you think Purple Haze, Hotel California, and Peace Train are all shots you drank at the last rave you went to, go away. You're too young to be reading this blog anyway.
Name: Jonathan Home: Grand Rapids, Michigan, United States About Me: Just a guy who trying to eek out a living as a graphic designer in SW Michigan. See my complete profile
Name: Jonathan
You are definitely too young to be reading this if you think "Mr Happy" is a Japanese cartoon figure.